Yesterday I had a conversation with a woman who works incredibly hard.
Her to-do list never gets smaller. The demand on her energy is high. The pay does not match the pressure. She feels stuck.
When I asked what she was looking for, she said she wanted a new and “better” job in the same field.
Now, I have no problem with improving your position within the same industry. Often, you will earn more simply because you have years of experience behind you. But as we talked, something became clear.
She did not love the industry she was in.
She worked in insurance. Most of her conversations were with people being told they did not have enough coverage. The energy was tense. The calls were draining. It was not aligned with how she wanted to show up in the world.
When I reflected that back to her, she paused.
What she actually wanted was behind-the-scenes organizational work. She wanted better pay. She wanted hybrid or remote flexibility. She wanted something that felt calmer and more structured.
Not a dream job.
Just something more aligned with the person she wants to become.
The Dream Job Trap
Most people think they need to “find their dream job.”
But what they are really saying is:
“I don’t know my purpose yet, but I hope the next job solves that.”
The struggle is not a lack of intelligence or ambition. It is the belief that if they search long enough or study hard enough, they will land a role that guarantees fulfillment for the rest of their life.
That is rarely how it works.
The problem is not that they are average. The problem is that they misunderstand two things:
- Who they are.
- What a job actually is.
What a Job Really Is
A job is a role that removes weight from someone else’s shoulders.
Usually someone with more money.
The question becomes:
What are the hardest, most annoying, most complex problems that someone else would rather not deal with?
The answer is often difficult, detailed, or repetitive work.
From hiring both in North America and overseas, I have learned something practical. Many administrative or operational tasks can either be automated or outsourced for less. So if you are looking for long-term growth, you have to ask a harder question than “What job should I get?”
Ask:
What skills do I want to build?
What problems do I not mind solving?
Who do I want to become over the next five years?
Alignment Over Fantasy
Instead of chasing a dream job, focus on alignment.
You are not looking for a forever role.
You are looking for a role that evolves you.
A job should build skills. It should stretch you. It should expose you to people and environments that shape your next step. Eventually, you move up or move on.
The answer changes as you change.
You do not discover your entire future in one decision. You uncover it layer by layer.
If You Feel Stuck
If you feel stuck, ask yourself:
What am I actually good at?
Or better yet, what don’t I hate doing?
Ask a close friend what they admire about you. What do they think makes you stand out, even in small ways?
That is your seed.
If you water it, develop it, and place yourself in environments where it can grow, you will naturally move toward better opportunities.
You do not need the perfect job.
You need the next aligned step.
And that is a much more manageable place to start.
